Understanding Modesty

I have come a long way from the way I used to dress and more importantly where I used to place my value and worth. I am so surprised sometimes, that God would have me talking on such a subject and that my passion for styling and presentation would be used to glorify Him. Just goes to show me, really how much I can worship Him with ALL of me, if I choose to.

Since growing in Christ and letting Him love and Father me, I have grown to love His standard of holiness and purity through His spirit. When dealing with modesty, the real changes take place in the heart, which then change the behaviour. Today in Christ, I am a firm believer that it's very possible to be Stylish and Fashionable without having to compromise your worth and dress immodestly. I understand that I am loved by God and set apart for Him, therefore my body is exclusively for Him

Areas to my body such as my thighs, my lower back, my tummy, my breasts (sometimes breast plate) and overall shape/silhouette, are all areas I choose to keep discreet. Why? You may ask?...well I believe that I am precious & precious things are covered. I see my body as what the bible describes, Gods temple-- His dwelling, so I don't wish to present His house, any old way. No one needs to see my nakedness, or even imagine me in such a manner. So I choose to not even be a potential option, to feed the spirit of lust, someone could be troubled with. I believe that displaying those areas are not needed to identify me as a woman--especially not a godly one. Although I used to believe that lie which I learnt from TV, music, and other insecure women that I thought were so admirable (especially celebrities at a time in my life). 

It does not reflect the purpose for why I was created as a female and completely doesn't show the VALUE that Christ showed me I was worth, when He paid the price for my soul. Oh how I love Him. I'm SO grateful! 

For this reason, I am so big on modesty! It is important to God, so it is important to me!! I have people asking me questions on what modesty actually is and whether or not their outfit is achieving this, so I put this blog together to help encourage my sisters in honoring God and to get ideas of how to stay beautiful from the inside out. Beauty comes from God and is deposited within us...it all stems from our character. Which is the reason behind 'Look Beyond The Surface'.
I’m going to break down modesty, as I have learnt it so far, in relations to how we dress as women, and also share what I do in my personal style to remain true to my vow to live for Him, with all of me. I pray that by the end of this post, we all have a better understanding of what it is, why it is important and how we can achieve this even in such extreme conditions, i.e sports and summer. -- I LOVE SUMMER! :D 

What is Modesty?!? 

Modesty is defined as the state or quality of being decent [reserved, discreet, meek, showing of good taste] in speech, dress, or behaviour.

Modesty is more than just clothes.It is about being God conscious and wanting to please Him with every area of your life. To always want to bring glory and attention to Jesus and not ourselves. Some individuals can be totally covered up from head to toe, yet still not have a pure spirit or a modest attitude. Modesty really requires Jesus, if you want a real everlasting change and more than pretty clothes put together. :) 

RE: Clothing - The very basic principle of clothing remains the same since Genesis when God clothed humans for the FIRST time. [Please read and study Genesis 4 for even more clarity]

Disobeying God, meant that sin entered into mankind and it caused Adam and Eve to realise that they were both naked. Their nakedness was not something that they flaunted but was a shameful thing which let them know that they disobeyed. They tried to cover themselves with fig leaves -- an attempt to make a temporary fixture, to cover their shame [humans have a tendency to this a lot] but they still knew they were naked. Satan, who deceived Eve, is still in the business of wanting us to uncover our bodies and reveal nakedness, to bring us back to that place of disobedience all over again...only in this day and age, he tries to make it seem like a fun thing to do, so people run towards it, rather than away from it.

I THANK GOD FOR HIS MERCY! Gen 4:21 tells us that Adam and Eve were clothed with animal skin in the form of a tunic, by GOD Himself, in order for their bodies to be covered. Throughout Scripture, God emphasizes on covering us, even when WE have done wrong to Him. It would be completely over for us, if God didn't have mercy on us, and He doesn't have to, but He chooses to give us an opportunity to get it right and obey Him, even after suffering the consequences of our own disobedience.

God, our Creator is more concerned with our inward beauty than the mere outward display and in 1 Timothy 2:9 He instructs us women of Christ, to adorn ourselves with proper clothing; modestly and discreetly. This is because we as ladies were never created to entice guys, be distractions or draw undue attention to ourselves, but we are to reflect His beauty through our character and cause for others to see Christ--to see godliness and glorify Him. Our character and being is then represented in our day to day living, which of course includes how we dress, as we do this practice, EVERYDAY. Whether you are into fashion or not, we all wear clothes everyday, and it is important we have the right guidelines for how to get it right. 

Who does it apply to?

Both male and female but primarily more focus is on the ladies, as men are more moved by what they see, so how we ladies present ourselves has a greater impact on them, then it would to us. 

However, no matter your body size or age, being discrete about your private areas / not uncovering your nakedness is honorable to God and also does show that you value yourself enough to not want people looking at you indecently. Not only that, but also not wanting people looking at YOU, instead of seeing the Christ IN you. 

What does it involve?

A renewed mind. Romans 12:2 style.

When we are/were in the world--(living with God not in heart), we picked up many things, which we believed and lived out. Even ideas, of what actually makes a woman a woman, what beauty is, what type of hair is beautiful, what makes a wife a wife and so many different things. In order to be modest, in a Christ like way, we must allow His word in our hearts, and let Him Father us with His love.

Change in character and lifestyle requires the Word of God which is what purifies /cleans us up of all things that are not right with us and not Godly. In any form of education, you learn for a period of time, then you have a series of coursework, tests and examinations, to test your knowledge...we have this too with the Word of God. Our day to day lives, provide us with the time to learn from Him, through private studies, bible studies, services, fellowships, godly blogs, godly videos and so many different places we learn. Learning is essential to growth, however we have to know that with all our getting, we must also get understanding on what we hear and read. We should ask God questions, so we can understand how to live out the word. Along with gaining understanding, we will also have a chance to put into practice all we hear. God allows different situations in our lives to act as tests, which we can either pass or fail. When we do not pass, we have to resit the same test, but not always with the same situation, yet this does not mean we have all the time in the world to get right with Him. Jesus returns soon, so we should do all we can to let Him train us up, because only those that are ready for His return shall go with Him. (Matt 25)

When it comes to Fashion and style, it involves being mindful and considerate of what you wear, how you wear it and having the right intentions. Now I don’t know about you, but I had to learn what it means to be considerate for others, especially the guys. I also had to learn and develop right intentions through the help of the Holy Spirit. God has taught me a lot on this subject and is still teaching me, which is why I have said before that as I develop as an individual my personal style reflects this too. 

Becoming and remaining modest involves these and other tips: 
    * Consulting God about what you are wearing 
    * Being God Conscious and wanting all the attention to be on Him and not ourselves.
    * Asking questions about your outfit to Him & trusted adviser's
    * Having a willing heart to change your outfit if it is going down the enticing/ self seeking path
    * Doing minor checks in the mirror before buying items or leaving the house 
* Knowing your body shape and dressing for it, rather than merely coping other peoples style. What is modest on a short lady may not be modest for a tall, curvy lady. So get to know your shape--what works for you and what works against you. 

Checks can include bending down, sitting down, going up the stairs and seeing if your dress or skirt rides up and shows your thighs, underwear or if your trousers are so tight that every bump & curve is overly visible to others. 

When does it apply or should I apply it? 

Whenever you are getting dressed and going to be before people. Once you know an outfit is a-okay then you won’t necessarily need to do the same checks again, unless your weight changes, but generally you should want to be modest everywhere you go. 

Personal integrity is so important when it does come to this subject. If you wouldn't wear it before your leaders, teachers, to a business meeting etc, then you shouldn't be wearing it before God and the world. He seeee us at all times, so if we are going to please Him with our lifestyle, it’s going to have to be all the time, not just when we feel like it.

Holiness has no holidays. < I was so inspired when the Holy Spirit dropped this in my Spirit one day. Somehow there was this misconception that when on holiday, you take a break from Christ and 'turn up', wear whatever, go wherever, lay half naked on a beach, and it's 'okay' because you are on 'holiday to have fun'. 
Holiness/purity/modesty has no holidays.  It is something that is to be applied and lived out everywhere. Being set apart for God should not change because it is now Saturday evening or a different country. Marriage to Christ is full time. Vows are made to be kept. 

This isn't written in the bible, but I did find this to be helpful & inspiring.  I want to keep this vow to Him; in my commitment to Him. This is something my heart had already decided to do before seeing this photo, but in your time with Him, make your own vow to Him. ONLY if you desire to keep it. If you cannot make a vow to Him, examine your heart against the word as to why not.

Where can I purchase goods to achieve this? 

Now this is a great question. I have come to realise that 'Godly Set Apart Women' are NOT the target market for most high street stores. They are not trying to support us in honoring God-- sadly. However that will not stop us! Most high street stores do have a lot of short or revealing items out there, but there are ways to get around them. For example, white shirts tend to be on the see through side, so I would just wear a vest underneath so that nothing is shown. 

Same way with some items you may have in your wardrobe, some may need to be gone, simply because they do not meet the standard of you being exclusively for Him, but others can be revamped to then act as a whole new outfit. 

More tips are available on my other posts & also the YouTube channel. 

Why is this important? 

It is important to God. He created us all to be whole beings that reflect His beauty and glory...yet satan wanted to steal, kill and destroy us all, with his lies and ideas about life. I thank GOD for Jesus, and for how He revealed to me that dressing indecently does NOT reflect His beauty at all, at all!

It is very possible to be elegant, stylish yet modest all at the same time. Being modest is a standard for all and being stylish is a bonus. We should never desire to be stylish above honoring God. That is not correct.

Have a look through my blog for ideas and inspirations on how you can be modest yet still stylish, if you please. Here is a small collection of some of my outfits over my time of blogging.

One of my favorite outfit looks of all time.

What I wore swimming.
A one piece swimsuit,  sports vest on top and baggy knee length shorts.
Sports direct is where I went.  
Love the all white look! 

Photo of when I was Personal Shopping with a client/ sister in Christ, while she tried on items I picked for her. (Not holding my bags, but hers)  

I love helping my sisters look modest & stylish for Christ. Royal & Regal -- that's the way! 

If we are ever more concerned and passionate about fashion & keeping up with the latest trends, then we are about righteousness [being in right standing with God] and having a heart sold out for Jesus....there is a problem! Somewhere, somehow God is not LORD over every area of our lives. I have to always examine myself so that HE is LORD forever -- in my heart and life. 

If He isn't LORD - the one with final say on what you wear, please please please, make EVERY effort to speak to God, to repent and get your priorities straight because modesty is a heart issue, not just an external issue. 

“If our hearts are right with God—if we’re walking in purity and humility before Him—the inevitable result will be a modest external appearance.” ~ DeMoss

For Videos in and around this topic and other Christ related things, YouTube Set Apart Style.

With great LOVE,
Nash Amber  


  1. I absolutely love this post, I actually wrote a blog post inspired by you some time ago that I would like your opinion on -http://misseducated31.blogspot.co.uk/2014/01/diss-cuss-thiss-are-you-modest.html

    Also I like the brown picture called the power of modesty really true I am borrowing it for my tumblr lol. In relations to me and this post I agree and admire your sense of fashion but I can proudly say I also dress to what suits me sometimes I may look boyish as in baggy trousers long jumpers and also dress feminine at times. I believe modesty comes from the heart. However your post did make me do some thinking and as allowed me to feel more comfortable and confident in my dress sense because in my heart I know why I pick up a piece of clothing a boy or something immoral is the last thing I think about when dressing.

    Great post.

    1. Hey Lady, Thank you for your comment, and sorry it has taken me a whole year to respond! I totally did not see this comment until now. Thank you for sharing your blog link and wow, I am so shocked that it was inspired by 'me'. Father has a way of really getting what we need, right when we need it and also through His children. I pray you are well in Him and being kept at perfect peace.

      The heart is what this is all about for sure. When that is healthy and full of His word, it will ooze out of out daily decisions. Bless you lady. :)

  2. Isn't showing your legs immodest?

    1. Hey, Father has not taught me that showing legs is immodest in itself, therefore I say no it is not. I keep my items below the knee or on the knee as I have the conviction that showing my thighs is a no no, but as for legs, I have peace about that.

    2. Hmmmm dear Nash, I must confess the truth, you're correct. I am in support of keeping skirts/clothings at the knee exactly or below the knee. That shows a great deal of decency. Keep up preaching the gospel of modesty and decency dear. GOD Bless you... cheers!!


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